Tuesday 8 November 2011

A Life Lesson from the Duggars on Maternal "Sacrifice"

While life is precious I do not believe the human body was designed to reproduce 20 times. The Duggar family announced today they are expecting baby number 20 due in April. So 19 pregnancies and 20 children later, Michelle (Momma Duggar) will have spent approximately 15 years of her life pregnant!!! Attached is a link to a video where they announce they are pregnant. In the video, when asked about her fears regarding the pregnancy (since her last pregnancy was extremely premature and put her life in danger with complications), and she said that sacrifice was the sign of a true mother. That she would sacrifice for all her children include those who have not yet to be conceived. I have to disagree with her. While there is a component of sacrifice with any parental role, I don’t believe that is what solely makes a true or good mother. A mother is so much more. A mother is care, compassion, empathy. They are everything associated with femininity sadly. But yet to be a mother is said to be the most rewarding experience.
            I am not yet a mother, and I don’t plan to be for several years. But yet does that make me a bad feminist for wanting to be a mother; for wanting to be caring and nurturing towards another life. I would have to say it does and it doesn’t. Being a mother helps to enforce the social notion of femininity as caring and nurturing. But at the same time, what is wrong being with caring and nurturing. I would argue that those qualities actually make for a better feminist. It is the ability to be caring and compassionate that allows feminists to see the fundamental differences within society and provide a drive for wanting to create change; for wanting to help the “oppressed” in a positive manner. I believe it helps to add the human aspect back to feminism.
            At the same time that feminism is aided by the qualities of motherhood, I do not think that a mother should have inherently “sacrifice” for her children (living or unborn). By this I mean that women should not be obligated to pregnancy and motherhood. Women should not have to give up their bodies, their careers, their way of life unwillingly. They should have autonomy over their life and their body. One thing I would strongly disagree with Mrs. Duggar about is that women do not have to have 20 children or even a child. It is a personal decision. While I cannot say much that she is pregnant again, I really wish I could tell her that it wouldn’t make her any less of a woman or a mother if she decided not to have number 20 (or even number 21 at the rate they are going).
            I guess Congratulations are in order to baby number 20. All the best to baby, mom and family through this pregnancy.

No comments:

Post a Comment